"This place is so highly rated!"

Yes it is, but mainly because it SUCKS!

Ruler of a Kingdom of Thorns

What a bunch of ignorant egotists!


As things go, most places with a "strong economy" are boring, isolated cow towns like Albuquerque or Salt Lake City. Well, welcome to the crowd, Twin Cities! You're probably the worst of all!

But most Minnesotans rant on and on about their strong economy as if it signifies that Minneapolis is a vibrant, world-class place like New York City! Plainly put, this kind of ignorance HAS TO stop! It's digging Minnesota society into an even deeper rut than it's in already! The fact that a place is so local that this viewpoint has persisted for at least the past two or three years is a sign of a sick society. Oh, and it doesn't help much that the news media seems to propel this viewpoint along.

"OOH this place has such strong family values! You can't say anything bad about us!"

My strongest brush with the Minnesota ego was when once, during a discussion, I made a lighthearted joke by comparing the difference between Minneapolis and St. Paul with the difference between taking a urine sample and taking a stool sample: it's sort of gross handing your doctor a cup of pee but not as bad as handing your doctor a plate of poop! Minneapolis is the cup of pee and St. Paul is the plate of poop. (That is to say, a lot of Minneapolis' reputation is based on comparing itself to something which is essentially the same thing but worse; the cowtown "Twin Cities" thus defined.)

Well, when I made this comment, I got stiff opposition from a fellow who acted like it should be illegal to say anything bad about this pristine Kingdom of Thorns! He appeared almost to have tears in his eyes. C'mon, can't you take a joke? I'm lucky you're not Caesar!


Edited 5/5/00

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